Listening to Intuition, Naming Fear, and Clarifying Our Desires

Dear Land Loved,

For the last few months, I’ve been moving through life with a scarcity mindset and making decisions from a place of fear. I noticed this especially when I decided to apply for a job that, in many ways, felt like a step back for my career. It didn’t excite me, the pay wasn’t good, and the commute would have been long, and my life would have been so overwhelmingly busy. But I applied anyway because I felt desperate to get my foot in the door of an agency doing the work I’m in school for. I kept thinking that if I was already inside the organization, then maybe, hopefully, I could secure the job in the organization I really want after graduation. It felt like I was trying to guarantee my future. When they told me they weren’t actively hiring, I felt such a huge sense of relief. That moment made something very clear to me.

I’m wondering how I can reconnect with a part of myself that makes choices from abundance rather than fear, because while I was deciding whether to apply, I couldn’t access that part at all. I keep thinking now about how my life might have felt if I had actually gotten the job, and what that would have meant for the path I truly want to follow. Thank you for creating this safe space to share this <3

Thank you so much for this question. In a time when fear feels so present in the world, and a scarcity mindset is constantly being sold to us by politicians, the media, and our culture, it’s more important than ever to tap into the parts of ourselves that can see clearly and make choices from a grounded place of inner knowing.

So let’s dive in.

You’ve already done the hardest part, which is noticing. You were able to witness yourself making choices from different states of being, and you could feel which felt better and which would serve you in the long run. I’m inclined to agree with you, we make much better choices for ourselves when we’re not acting from fear. You saw that your actions (applying for a job that wouldn’t truly serve you) and your desires (working in your field) weren’t in alignment, and when they told you they weren’t actually hiring, you felt a huge sense of relief. That clarity is a gift. 

So how do we reconnect with the parts of ourselves that help us make choices from abundance rather than fear? A few things come to mind.

First: slow down and ground. What do I mean by that? Build a ritual or routine that reconnects you with your body and with the earth, something that brings you out of your thinking mind and into your lived experience. Maybe you light a candle and breathe deeply. Maybe you have a gentle yoga practice. Maybe you give yourself an orgasm. Maybe you put your hands in the dirt. Maybe you go on a run. The more you show up for your chosen practices, the easier it becomes to access your inner voice instead of your fear voice.

Second: get super clear on what you actually want. It’s so much easier to make choices that align with our true goals and values when we’re clear about them. For me, reconnecting with my intuition through grounding exercises and visualization has been transformative. The way in will look different for everyone, but learning to hear and trust your intuition will save you a lot of time and grief. When you learn to recognize that inner guidance, you’ll see more quickly when fear is masquerading as “practical advice.” Here is an example of a meditation I do daily to ground myself and tap into my intuition and inner knowing. Think of intuition as a muscle: when you practice listening, it becomes easier to hear and trust.

Once you have a way to get out of your head, you can come back into your head as a gentle observer. One exercise I like is to say my fears out loud or write them down, then ask myself: Is this true? Spoiler alert: fear rarely is. When I see that a fear isn’t grounded in truth, I give myself a new more supportive belief or story to lean on. Over time, those new stories become the ones I return to in moments of doubt. That’s how we create new neural pathways and shift our default responses.

Another tool that helps me is reminding myself of both/and reality. For example: yes, there is a reality where the job market feels terrible and everyone feels desperate. And yes, there is also a reality where you find meaningful work that pays well and supports the life you want to live. Both can be true at the same time, and you get to choose which reality you step into.

And please remember: it’s okay to be afraid, to be unsure, to stumble. We get better by noticing and practicing: exactly what you’re already doing. Next time you apply for a job, check in with yourself as you fill out the application. Notice how you’re feeling. Keep a list of what you want and expect from a job nearby, and look at whether each opportunity aligns with that list. And if fear shows up, well that’s normal. Maybe light a candle and take five deep breaths, reminding yourself of what you want and why you deserve it.

You’re already learning how to choose from abundance. Keep trusting the process.🖤

Warmly,

Vanessa